Sunday, December 14, 2008

saracens and christians and freaks, oh my!

bouche bée, i'm not sure how i'm feeling at the moment. hungry, tired, excited, stressed?
the final crunch is getting started.
i am so bad at managing multiple papers; i finish one and want to go on vacation! in december i always remember why i shouldn't have taken so many classes. but oh, the pleasure of reading.
one of my professors actually told me i was "addicted to classes" and that he hadn't seen a "case as severe" as mine before. hmmm..... but if i didn't have class, i think i would vegetate entirely too much. i need a bit of rigor, structure and order. i know it should come from within, but oh well, i'm working on that. maybe one day i'll really be independent!! but then i wonder if that moment ever truly comes. so many of my friends who are already professors, with tenure, etc., are still not able to be as independent (free) as they would like; i wonder if it is just another elusive ideal. baahhhh

well, i should get back to work. i'm waiting for pizza to arrive, which is disgusting. i don't even feel like having pizza tonight/this morning, i just really need the liter of diet coke. it's sick, i know.

Thursday, December 11, 2008

a bit of fun before i settle down with a paper for the night....
i've seen this a lot lately on some of the great blogs i follow, like and

Bold the ones you've done:
1. Started my own blog-- well yes
2. Slept under the stars -- lots of sleep-away camping fiascos as a youngster...well, maybe i enjoyed them then, but i'm not up for nights in nature these days....
3. Played in a band
4. Visited Hawaii
5. Watched a meteor shower-- i've only seen one shooting star, ever. could be the terrible eyesight
6. Given more than I can afford to charity
7. Been to Disneyland/world
8. Climbed a mountain
9. Held a praying mantis-- i think this might kill me. for some reason i hate green insects more than any other kind.
10. Sung a solo-- three times. pie jesu in highschool, a song from the musical notre dame de paris, and l'amour est un oiseau rebelle for the cultural show i was forced by an eavesdropping spanish teacher to preform at in college. though i love to sing, i think all of these involved me flat on my back, hyperventilating before i had to go onstage, while my poor friends tried to get me to stand. yeah...
11. Bungee jumped
12. Visited Paris-- ma deuxieme maison. i lived there a while and have visited about 8 times
13. Watched lightning at sea
14. Taught myself an art from scratch-- hmmm, not really
15. Adopted a child-- four-legged children probably do not count
16. Had food poisoning-- too much drink and cheer/ being forced to eat duck and beef at awkward social event after years of vegetarianism... (i really loved the duck...and dream of it now, weird)/i've probably tried to justify it as food poisoning, but oh yeah, maybe once
17. Walked to the top of the Statue of Liberty-- oh god yes, as an angry tween on a trip with my mother. pure hell
18. Grown my own vegetables
19. Seen the Mona Lisa in France-- yes, and yes, its tinyness shocked me
20. Slept on an overnight train -- yes, from spain to germany or something like that
21. Had a pillow fight
22. Hitchhiked-- yes, and once was also picked up for hitchhikind with my best friend
23. Taken a sick day when you’re not ill-- yes, but not often. i do have a friend who misses a lot of school/work and justifies everything as a mental health day.
24. Built a snow fort
25. Held a lamb
26. Gone skinny dipping-- never ever, no way, absolutely not, though there were naked girls in fountains /running rampant at my SLAC
27. Run a Marathon
28. Ridden in a gondola in Venice
29. Seen a total eclipse
30. Watched a sunrise or sunset
31. Hit a home run
32. Been on a cruise-- the "booze cruise"
33. Seen Niagara Falls in person
34. Visited the birthplace of my ancestors-- i mean, grosso modo...spain, france, etc
35. Seen an Amish community
36. Taught myself a new language
37. Had enough money to be truly satisfied-- in theory i guess, but the outrageous student loans from undergrad kind of mar the currently earned money
38. Seen the Leaning Tower of Pisa in person
39. Gone rock climbing
40. Seen Michelangelo’s David
41. Sung karaoke-- oh god, once, in Lyon, it was mortifying.
42. Seen Old Faithful geyser erupt
43. Bought a stranger a meal at a restaurant
44. Visited Africa
45. Walked on a beach by moonlight
46. Been transported in an ambulance
47. Had my portrait painted -- sketched, and chalked painted.
48. Gone deep sea fishing
49. Seen the Sistine Chapel in person-- why cant i remember this for the life of me!!
50. Been to the top of the Eiffel Tower in Paris -- yes, the person who made this must really like Paris
51. Gone scuba diving or snorkeling
52. Kissed in the rain
53. Played in the mud
54. Gone to a drive-in theater
55. Been in a movie
56. Visited the Great Wall of China
57. Started a business
58. Taken a martial arts class
59. Visited Russia
60. Served at a soup kitchen
61. Sold Girl Scout Cookies
62. Gone whale watching
63. Got flowers for no reason
64. Donated blood, platelets or plasma
65. Gone sky diving
66. Visited a Nazi Concentration Camp
67. Bounced a check
68. Flown in a helicopter
69. Saved a favorite childhood toy --i cannot give them up, it's sick
70. Visited the Lincoln Memorial-- i was a block away in September, but did not ditch a conference like many other people to go see it. obedience, obedience, fear, fear
71. Eaten caviar -- against my will, on sushi, blech
72. Pieced a quilt
73. Stood in Times Square
74. Toured the Everglades
75. Been fired from a job
76. Seen the Changing of the Guards in London
77. Broken a bone
78. Been on a speeding motorcycle -- If i could only drive....
79. Seen the Grand Canyon in person
80. Published a book
81. Visited the Vatican-- I cant remember this either...
82. Bought a brand new car
83. Walked in Jerusalem
84. Had my picture in the newspaper
85. Read the entire Bible
86. Visited the White House
87. Killed and prepared an animal for eating
88. Had chickenpox
89. Saved someone’s life-- no, but i was saved from choking to death on a cinammon disk when i was 7, that would have been a horrible death
90. Sat on a jury
91. Met someone famous-- lots of people in the music world...too many to count, but yo yo ma, itzak perlman, sarah chang, dionne warwick, daniel barenboin...and then my opera loves, angela brown (twice), maureen o'flynn. lots of academic/writerly superstars
92. Joined a book club
93. Lost a loved one
94. Had a baby
95. Seen the Alamo in person
96. Swam in the Great Salt Lake
97. Been involved in a law suit
98. Owned a cell phone-- of course, and I always manage to break them
99. Been stung by a bee-- once on the hand
100. Ridden an elephant-- camel! but no elephant =(

other than that i don't have that much to say.. the recent slew of fatal/near-fatal car accidents, human strokes and animal strokes that have been affecting my family have me a bit foggy headed. ah well, at least i can attack the end of the semester writing as a cathartic distraction...i hope

Tuesday, December 9, 2008

"meh" has really picked up these last few days.
maybe it's the end of the semester rush that makes it so hard to express oneself, i'm not sure. maybe it's just general apathy.
only 4 classes left until the end of the finals period!!!!!
i am getting excited about the mla but freaked out about the amount of work due before the 19th or 21st or whenever things are actually due. i should figure that out....
today i'm just sleepy. blah

Thursday, November 13, 2008

"done is good"

I feel like each day I become less and less productive. Or maybe it is just the November slump. I really dislike November, gahh. It is entirely too hot on the west coast; I nearly fainted today from the heat. I crave changing leaves, wind, snow and a stiff drink, in that order.

At my college we had this thing called "Done is good." Basically "Done is goods" were just little slips of paper, usually elaborately decorated by some poor girl with entirely too much time on her hands, that served as emotive-ish do lists. We'd all fill them out and hang them up in the dorm so that we were able to keep track of all of the work we had until the end of the semester...these lists usually started cropping up around thanksgiving I think. It was always cathartic.... It was great to put your list up, and make fun of/pity the people who had more/less/the same amount of work as you/your friends; we were all so euphoric, carefree and young! Plus, the awesome part was that the RAs would give you candy as you went along, depending on how many tasks you completed. They'd hand out plump bag-fulls when your list was finally done. It was part torture, part pleasure...the angst, suspense and greed for free candy and food. I've tried to implement the same system, but living alone, it's not nearly as fun. One of my college friends and I still do it together (more or less over the phone since she lives on the blessed east coast), and it works decently, but I always cheat and eat the candy before I even make the list. Plus since I buy it myself, there's no real incentive. mehhhh. but since I'm already starting to forget the things I'm supposed to do before the end of the semester, I might as well make one here, just in case.

Done is good:
1. paper 1
2. paper 2
3. paper 3
4. paper 4?
5. think about finishing up incomplete? (hah, think about...what a loophole!)
6. manuscript project
7. final class presentation
8. pedagogy project draft
9. pedagogy project final
10. syllabus for next semester
11. fix up the small articles
12. final latin exam AHHH
13. figure out life/get life coach/run away
14. finally respond to kind of ex-boyfriend to congratulate him on his engagement
15. figure out if I should actually go to engagement party/wedding or not....

oh good god, now I just feel screwed....deep breath, deep breath. It's not so bad, I just need to get started on #13 at least, and stop faffing around on the internetz. Man, I lose hours with the lolcats, tina fey and political business.